Fellows of SOM: Sivagami Lakshmanan ’26, Cultivating Conversation Student Fellowship

Why did you pursue this fellowship, and what does it mean to you?

I pursued the Cultivating Conversation Student Fellowship because I wanted to create spaces where people feel safe enough to disagree, tell the truth about their experiences, and still stay in relationship with one another. I believe that when people can voice their thoughts without barriers and bring their full selves without hesitation, real development and growth can occur. The fellowship’s focus on deep listening, emotional intelligence, and dialogue facilitation aligns with the kind of leader I hope to become, at SOM and in my career: someone who can hold complexity, surface hard truths, and move groups toward understanding rather than polarization.

On a personal level, this fellowship gives me a structured way to practice my values. I have often been the informal “bridge-builder” in teams and classrooms; this experience has given me the language, tools, and coaching to do that work more intentionally and sustainably, rather than relying on instinct alone.

How does your status as a fellow impact the way you engage with your community and contribute to your overall SOM experience?

Being a fellow has made me more deliberate about how I show up in both the SOM classroom and the broader Yale and New Haven community. I now think consciously about how to design conversations, who is in the room, what questions we ask, and how we set norms. These are considerations I now navigate for my various leadership roles—as alumni affairs chair with the Student Government, co-president of the Impact Investing Club, and a board member of the South Asia Graduate Association, among others—in the university community.

Within SOM, I draw on these skills in team meetings, student club discussions, and debriefs on charged topics like inequality, politics, or organizational change. I’m becoming more comfortable naming tensions and slowing down when emotions rise. I want to help groups stay with disagreement long enough to learn from it through digging on the “why,” rather than rushing to a superficial consensus.

What lessons have you learned that will help you contribute to business and society at SOM and beyond?

Three lessons stand out:

Discomfort is not failure; it is data. I’ve learned that when a conversation feels tense or uncomfortable, it often means we are finally touching something real. The fellowship has reframed discomfort as a signal to slow down, check in, and invite more curiosity, rather than a cue to change the subject.

Listening is an active leadership skill, not a passive one. Through the workshops, I practiced listening for what is not being said, reflecting on what I hear, and asking intentional questions that move a conversation forward. In business settings, this translates into stronger stakeholder engagement, healthier team dynamics, and more inclusive decision-making.

Understanding the reasoning behind people’s opinions is essential. If you do not go beyond the surface, you may never discover that your underlying motivations are often quite similar, even if your approaches differ. When you make space to genuinely hear others, you are more likely to find a middle ground and build solutions that everyone can embrace.

What’s one highlight of this experience?

One highlight was a session where fellows practiced facilitating a conversation on a genuinely contentious topic drawn from our own lives. Instead of role-playing, we discussed real disagreements around identity, politics, or institutional power, and took turns facilitating while others gave feedback.​

It was both vulnerable and energizing. I saw other fellows share stories they had never voiced at Yale, and I experienced how intentional facilitation can transform a potentially polarizing conversation into an opportunity for connection and learning. That night crystallized why this work matters and gave me confidence that I can help hold those kinds of spaces in my career and one day facilitate change in the world.

What advice do you have for other students interested in this fellowship?

There is a lot to gain from the fellowship, and everyone’s reasons for pursuing it can be different. There is no single “right” motivation. So, be honest about why this work matters to you and share concrete experiences where you saw conversation break down or witnessed its power to heal.

This fellowship is experiential and asks you to try new tools, sit with discomfort, and apply what you learn in your real leadership roles, so prepare yourself for that commitment.

Come in with humility and curiosity. It helps to name the areas where you struggle—whether you avoid conflict, speak too quickly, or become defensive—and to reflect on where and why you want to grow. The most meaningful part of the fellowship is learning alongside people who are willing to be honest and practice together.